In The News

Here is what is in the news for today:

- A baby boy in Brooklyn was born with 6 fingers on each hand and 6 toes on each foot. I guess a couple extra fingers isn't a big deal when you have a great view of the wonderful polluted Brooklyn River.

- In Tennessee, a man is in big trouble after he gave fake $100 bills to strippers to buy lap dances. You know you're a dumbass when even strippers can tell that you are trying to screw them.

- A Pennsylvania High School band was given cookies with laxatives which caused them to get sick. People noticed something was wrong when they started playing shitty.

- In India, Indian officials have been lining up cows from Villagers to take photographs to prevent illegal trade of cows to Bangladesh. Correct me if I'm wrong... but, don't cows pretty much look alike? What's next, Hooves-(cow feet)-printing?

- A Chinese woman is jailed for the next 18 months because she stole a baby from a hospital to prove to her boyfriend that she can bare children. What's more shocking is that she didn't even try adoption. Did Angelina Jolie/Madonna adopted them all? WTF?